My "A" race is coming up quickly. I've been training hard for a long time, putting in long hours (years of base-building and more recently, some hard intervals) and I think I'm ready, but there's still that lingering hesitation. Did I do enough? Will my training come through when I need it? It's going to hurt, that's for sure. But I'm lucky. Speedy has been the greatest sherpa I could ask for, willing to put up with me, cook for me, and take care of me. He listens to me complain when the training gets hard and I get tired, and then he encourages me to take a break or push through, depending on which he thinks I need more at the time. Hopefully, all of his work and mine will be rewarded soon, and then the rest and recovery season begins.
Yes, that's right. The bar exam is in 12 days.
I am going back and forth between, "I've done lots of hard work and will be fine" and, "I wonder what kind of jobs I can do with a law degree that don't involve passing the bar . . . ." This is standard taper talk, right? For the most part, I am sticking with the more positive view, but it's tough when burn-out starts to set in. As anyone who has taken the bar exam knows, studying for the bar is a job in itself, and it's not one that you can leave at the office. Fortunately, only a little longer and it will all be over, hopefully with good results.
In the meantime, I'm trying to fit in my training around my studying. The workouts I'm really enjoying now are the hard intervals, because I can't think about studying when I'm too busy trying not to puke. That's not to say long rides don't have their advantages during studying. For instance, during my ride this past weekend I finally made sense of a minor issue of Constitutional Law that had been confusing me, but my hard workouts are the ones that really help me clear my head and get ready for the next stretch.
This is the final push of a more-than-three-year season. I just have to keep at it for a few more days, and rock out when it's time. I'm trained. I'm ready. Now I just have to pass.